A Poet Never Sleeps

One day you will be faced with the impossible. When you become afraid, become inspired.

07 November 2014

Sky Diving Without a Parachute



It’s  a downward slope

You don’t notice how far you’ve gone

You just keep going

It doesn’t feel like work

Till you look up


Falling towards many points

One or two I'm not so sure

Others I’m positive of

Yet can’t land

Because someone’s already there

 I don’t mind

Society says I ought to

Yet still I fall



There’s a few that I can see

Are safe to land

Yet only on sunny days

When the wind is blowing right

Only then can I see the target

But for the most part

It isn’t a risk-free option


I could land today

If I felt like it

But I won’t

It’s foolish but I won’t

Because maybe the best part

Is falling

Not knowing where to land

That uncertainty


28 October 2014

Words of Advice from a Guy Crazy Girl

All these boys whose eye I caught

Now others’ eyes they catch


But I don’t mind

I never did

For this never lasts

Each glance a different breeze

Passing through an open window

Perhaps they’ll ring the bell

And disappear again

Only for a new spirit

To take their place


Their differences keep me laughing

Between the old and new,

What I expect

And what I'm learning





You stand

And my heart stops

You call my name

And the room falls silent

A collective breath in taken

Shakily I stand

Thoughts race through my mind

Every fear and hope crashing into one

You say you’re sorry

That can we be friends again

A watery nod

And then a tight hug

As if we’re afraid

That when we let go

This will all slip away again

I whisper I’m sorry


As I sit down

Relief crashes over me

A smile splits my face

The next morning I sing and dance

We act as if the last months never passed

A pause button reset

Stopping only to apologize

Conversation flows again

As if it never stopped

Perhaps rough water lies ahead

But we can take it on

25 September 2014

My Mysterious Man

Newly on the hunt

You sweep me off my feet

Only to set me down

To chase someone else


You keep drawing near

Yet as soon as I lean in

Off again you go

A new breeze to catch



How I expect

Absolute devotion

From many

Yet I flit between

Only to become melancholy

When one pulls away


I think it’s time you took your step

As the ball rolls into your court

Only to watch it crack

I was born

To bury my parents


To watch them die

From the start I learned


To cook


And change diapers



Wife, Daughter

Sister, Friend

Born into a shadow


Laden with expectations

I blossomed within the mold

17 September 2014

Thoughts on Falling in Love with a Broken Heart

My heart has been broken, so, many times

That it will never be repaired

Instead it sits broken

Into hundreds


Of itty bitty hearts

Each beating on its own

Yet all at once


Love is but a myth

Clung to by fools

Who fear falling into oblivion

I care for every drop of life

Am fond of every existence

Kindness, the closest to this forever

I want to kiss the stars


Can each shard love differently

My tomorrows beautiful

My forevers long

Perhaps I do not love one soul

But humanity in every form

Not a life

To which I won’t give my own

No cause too mighty

Or person insignificant


A broken heart

Has many windows

For love to wiggle in

Many pieces

To give away as I please

Love comes to a broken heart

As rain on an autumn day


Often cold

Sometimes, sometimes forgiving

Yet it always brings a smile

And you must dance

To the clamor of a million drums


I hope my heart breaks again

And again

And again

Each scar proves I’m open
To every drop of life

To every single beat

That I never stopped once

Stopped giving more

Tomorrow is still coming


I pity those with a single heart

For how does love flow

Into a room without doors

How do you hear a song

In absolute silence

A broken heart need not heal

But only keep beating

12 September 2014

And I Can Write Again

Why can’t I write about this

Why can’t I cleanse my heart in the usual way

Why must I hold this inside to stew

Only to gush out at the worst of times


This is the secret I keep from everyone

I keep from myself

I bear it in total silence

Always going inward


Perhaps a little part of me

Wants people to know my soul

So I write it down

But this is more than that


This is not my soul

 But the color of my past

I refuse to be defined by it

So I hide it deep within


This is a double edge sword

No one knows so I can’t be judged

Yet I can’t talk about it

Or I will be so


Maybe if I don’t admit it’s there

Like the people that I hate

It will go away

For Always

Since I spoke my mind

I’ve become an outcast

But only in her presence


Without her they come to me

Talk to me

See me


I could be invisible forever

Yet they come

How strange


Thank you

For seeing me

Part of the time


Only a few are constant

Thank you

For not picking sides


I will not argue

I’d rather be your friend for thirty

Than never speak to you again


Thank you

For seeing me

Even when you shouldn’t


Thank you

For being there

When it really counts


And thank you

To my little sis

As individuals but not as more?

Where do I begin with you

We were so close it was like breathing

Talking to you


Then we dated

And all hell broke loose

I had to cut the cord


I broke your heart

This I know is true

Have I ever said I'm sorry


You have dated many since then

I my fair few as well

You say you’re happy with her now


Our conversations flow again

We’re closer now than ever before

The perfect couple


Which leads me to wonder

Why do we work now


Maybe I should say hello

So I said to myself just the other day

That to read my blog was to read my mind

How strange it must seem then

To have something be important

Yet not written about

Not so big that I sing nor cry

Or something so big that it must be kept inside


Then I thought of you



With whom I flirt every day

I bat my eyes when you look my way

I love that little smile that you give me

But only when I catch your eye

It’s so easy talking to you

That I forget this is something new

11 September 2014

But you haven’t said a word

You’re so alone

And so am I

You walk past

Without a word


I catch your eye over your shoulder


When all are around

I'm confused

You stand so near

Yet so far away


I can count every dream of ours


I remember every smile

The empty ones blurred out

Everything has changed

Yet here you are




But Then What Is It?

That smile

No that smirk

That crosses your face

When I walk your way

Was it something I said

Or did

Am I really that different


A sudden interest you show me

I can’t put my finger on it

Every thought shouts no

Yet there it is

I wonder if you realize

You’re the only one

Who sees me


I'm not allowed to show you

Tell you

Or anyone

Any of this

I would lose my only friend

Besides you

I cant


I'm not right for you

I'm cold

And broken

You have someone

Who loves you

Why would you choose



Is this all in my head

A silly day dream


It must

It can be nothing more

Than a fantasy


I know I was the one

To tip the scale

And finally say goodbye


Why do I feel such sorrow


You scream and cry

When I enter the room

Curse with every breath my name


Why does this affect you so


In the shadows I lived for months

Trying to be seen

Yet I’m lonely in the light


I reach for you

Yet remember I may not

I’m desperate for a sign


Whether it be screaming anger

Bitter weeping

Or a long hiding hello


I crave something

13 August 2014

I cry when noone looks

Forced to age

In a blink

In a flash

In the time it took to look back


The unspoken words

Sit heavy in my chest

This responsibility

I choke down




My only regret

Taking out of my anger

The one who understands

This is when i am beautiful

In the morning

Face round with sleep

Hair a greasy mess

Spilling from a stretched night shirt

And lips tight over braces


In the evening

Eyes weary with exhaustion

Makeup smudged

Fighting to stay awake


Same tired smile

Yet unchanged by society  

To old ways

I can finally breathe

Stretching without the weight

My fingers still reach to adjust the straps

Only to find bear skin


Dazed by blinding light

Only to realize I lived in the dark

This light I see

Had been there all along


I see my cruel mistress

Yet my heart does not call out

For I shall never return

What keeps us from our pedistal

Don’t do something

Because it’s easy

No, do it for the challenge  


Never be the brightest in the room

For what will you learn

But only how to dwindle your time


Of all the deadly sins

Lust, greed, deceit, gluttony

Perhaps sloth the worst of all


Why give in

With the finish line in sight


When a dish falling

Sounds like the echo of a bomb

A whispered work

An order shouted

A glance becomes daggers


Where once a great councilor lead

Now dying solders run their own

Camped in what was a mighty fortress

Now they cower in crumbling ruins

Unable to stand their ground


This constant

Battle against the unslayable beast

Redefining fighting on the home front

For you sleep with your enemy.  

A Hidden Perfection

She does not need tight shirts

Or sky high heels

She doesn’t need push up bras

Or pounds of make up


She has subtle grace

And class

She has peaceful happiness

And a razor sharp wit


Wise beyond her years

She’s left the cocoon of petty youth

No longer does she slip into jealous rage

Instead maternal understanding overflows  

The life you save may be your own

Take every action with heed

A butterfly’s wave of sorrow

Who knows what weight others bear

A simple work can lift one up

Or crush them to the ground

Beneath a leaden boot


A minuscule jester of love

May change someone’s world

For love is kindness’s work boots


Never overlook a foe

Nor burn a broken bridge

Underneath may shine anew

Fiction of the Past

Our truths
space travel, computers
heath and happiness

Dare I Disturb The Universe

For the first time in forever

The universe rests in my palms

Destroyed with a swift tip


Supreme power courses through my veins

Rendering others powerless

Helpless victims to my will


No great pain would I receive

No lasting problems would occur

Yet I will refrain

Even the White Dove Has More Personality

So many pine for loves embrace

Changing their soul in desperation

Carving themselves to fit the mold


Their only passion, society’s

Saying, thinking, only what they ought

Uniquely black and white




You must live to love life

For who can cherish a blank wall

It is life who throws the paint

Her Fate Dangles Before Our Eyes

Her Dangles Fate Before Our Eyes


Behind Opaque glass

The future sits

O how I hunger for it


Its outline blurred by doubt

Chained back by the present

My fingers barely skim the surface


Weak with want

Craving the taste upon my lips

An obsessive passion


Everyone desires the caress of this cruel mistress

Cheating life for her embrace

Only to have her slip through outstretched fingers



To Grow Into Something More

How is a fire to burn

Without fuel

A spark doomed to die


Never be the smartest man in the room

For you stand in the wrong place

A spark doomed to die


Trapped in an empty tomb

A blank canvas without paint

A spark doomed to die


Eventually a brilliant mind wilts

If kept from stirring force

Or Drown In The Process


Blow after blow after blow

Draining away my smile

With each hit

The basin runs dry


Roll with the punches

Or they will knock you down

As you writhe upon the ground

It will come back with swift kicks


Only when you cry out

Do others take notice

Sneering at your weakness

Scared to admit that they harbor their own


Life continues to move on

Rushing by increasingly fast

So you must stand again

08 June 2014

Yet Still I Crumble

Only here I’d reveal my truths

The honest outpouring of my subconscious

Things I’d never voice

Come to life in ink


One hope I unknowing clang to

Now crushed underfoot by reality

The horrors of my bind, blessing in time

He hands me the final blow


As I dreamed of my perfect bubble

Pained lunged in from behind

Destroying the final glimmer of hope

All this I must bear in silence


I step up to embrace the victor

Not her choice to my demise

Zuit Suit

Rock step

Triple step

Step step

Triple step

Rock step

Ending where we began


In this dance we pull together

And back apart

Quickly spinning about

In time to a beating heart

Closer and closer

Only to fall again


Sometimes we hold the wrong hand

Just tapping as we twist

Others we kick in step

I trust that you will catch me

Ducking under and swirling into open arms



10 March 2014

Eagerly Searching Beyond Its Time

I grew up in my early years

Wise beyond my years

No need to gain my own knowledge


But mother nature,

The shrewd teacher that she is

Feld I could use a refresher


Sometimes I hide behind my youth

Light and carefree

Blending into the crowd


But in a blink of an eye

I aged ten years

The shadow falls on my face


Trapped in earthly bonds

As my inner eye flies ahead


In Chains From Birth to Death

We are prisoners of time

Made of ticks and tocks

Bound under a crystalline face


Each morning we beg our master to wake us

Angry still when he does

Yet each day we fall on our knees


We subject ourselves to his whim

In exchange for a few minutes of sunshine

We deprive ourselves


This master is not of nature

For birds don’t heed his presence

Yet still we flock to him


Although we lament our misfortune

We’d be lost in our forward motion


To Burn away the Fog

This ridiculas thing called love

A morass


On one side a familiar light

But drawing near it dims


Another one I hated and ignored

Not it shines brighter,

But it sits within a cage, unattainable


A new light appears

Behind it a mystery hides


A few candle tips flicker in the breeze

Not strong enough to follow


Perhaps a new star is needed

Instead I Turn and Run

I say I’m over it

As I walk away

When really I’m lieing


I held to that desperate dream

As you cease to care

Foolish little girl


Here and now my foot stomps

I hope my heart to someone else

Even if I only find silence


Enough of this resent full dance

Enough of shattered futures

Enough of awkward silences


No prolonged goodbyes




The Echoes of Lost Love

A single though haunts my mind

Frightening me to the bone

Calling open the gruesome past


A beast looming over me

Snarling from dark corners

Rearing its ugly head when least expected


Soon others notice this towering monster

Comments on its appearance

Some call for its life, others death


Unfed and ignored

The creature begins to shrivel up and die

Desperate for the light


It recedes into icy tombs


Flirting without action till the end of time


Too many thoughts to put on paper

How quickly by they fly


Yet your name stands out


Each time I grab my pen

It’s you I want to write about


In the dark

It’s my hand you seek


An unspoken agreement


Although nothings set in stone

I hope you make the move


Or perhaps we’ll live

In this endless purgatory


A Smoky Pillar of Noise

We both are trying

Practically running the other way

Swearing up and down the negative


But as we step away

Begin to warm up elsewhere

Affirm our separation


That’s when the universe hits

Inevitably falling together

Hit over the head by fate


As the cosmos spin about us

There you stand, still,


To Turn on the Light

Still as I turn away

Your reach out towards me

I am baffled by you


Again we teeter

Between tempting fate

And oblivion


Warm glances hidden by cool shoulders

Coquetry buried under school work

Subtle brushes in the crowds


More in love with you I fall each day

Although this I always will deny

We keep our dance in the shadows


Although time is running short

We are offered one last chance


27 February 2014

That When I Do You'll Leave

I cut the cord

Said no, I’m done

Joyfully turned the page


And that very moment

That the page fell

You called out to me


Although I refuse to bend

Again and again you flirt

Proving this not mere coincidence


Every fiber of my being begs me to relent

But intuition reasons

No Good in the Bye

A pretty little trinket

To be taken off the shelf

When others are around


Your knew that it will sit

Till you put others in its place


You want new ones to fill the time

To meet what others think


You never thought someone would pick it up

To learn to read the book


But not it is my freedom


For you were a chapter in my book

And I was merely a line in yours

12 February 2014

Timid or Indifferent?

As traces  begin to fade

I begin to doubt the fire

Accept my love unrequited


A spark in the dark ignites

A smile that reflects the past

Sends mournful clarity spinning


Is this how we’ll spend our time

Dashing between times of joy and sorrow

Craving love in the darkness


You say I make you smile

Yet no a smile you spare me

What is this?

A Single Breath of Hope


Your mother’s smile

Glances over the wheel

Our fingers intertwined

Or your hands on my hips

Those bright socks

Sprinting through the parking lot

Drunkards falling over

Sparkly Christmas lights

Leaning on pizza pallor bars

A single lost glove

Slow dances, swaying softly

Swing dancing to pop music

Meeting your friends

Showing each other off

Receiving sly smiles

A crushed white rose

A damp dog nose

A crisp eve

Plans for the future

Talks of the past

But End the Night as Friends

A night beyond words

Smiles dance on my lips

As my story unfolds


Although our time was short

Each moment simple bliss

They affirmed my silliest dreams


But a few questions come to mind


Where does it leave us

Could we have filled more time

Will we progress tomorrow


We spent the evening lovers

Our finger interlocked

Was All I Really Wanted

Guns raised

Locked and loaded

Hiding behind the corner

Ready to shoot


When the white flag was dropped

Completely out of the blue

Old plans thrown out of action

And bitter anger dissolved


Although the past not forgotten

Perhaps a sincere unwarranted apology

Our Patchwork Quilt

They don’t stand against you


Only for themselves

Their triumphs

Not your needs they see


The easiest ways to hide a lie

Is to bury it beneath truth

A little lie

Lost in the sea of reality

Unable to show its colors


Maybe these gossamer threads

Hold our universe together

Seamlessly knitting and unknotting